Would you like to swing on a star,
Carry moonbeams home in a jar,
And be better off than you are,
Or would you rather be a mule?

A mule is an animal with long funny ears,
He kicks up at anything he hears,
His back is brawny and his brain is weak,
He’s just plain stupid with a stubborn streak,
And by the way if you hate to go to school,
You may grow up to be a mule.

Or would you like to swing on a star,
Carry moonbeams home in a jar,
And be better off than you are,
Or would you rather be a pig?

A pig is an animal with dirt on his face,
His shoes are a terrible disgrace,
He’s got no manners when he eats his food,
He’s fat and lazy and extremely rude,
But if you don’t care a feather or a fig,
You may grow up to be a pig.

Or would you like to swing on a star,
Carry moonbeams home in a jar,
And be better off than you are,
Or would you rather be a fish?

A fish won’t do anything but swim in a brook,
He can write his name or read a book,
To fool the people is his only thought,
And though he’s slippery, he still gets caught,
But then if that sort of life is what you wish,
You may grow up to be a fish.

And all the monkeys aren’t in the zoo,
Ev’ry day you meet quite a few,
So you see it’s all up to you.
You can be better than you are,
You could be swinging on a star.